I will remember to smile next time

Dear Anne,

Since you see us as a sweet couple, I will use this metaphor to explain what I want to say. (Actually, being partners is also like in a relationship because you have commitments and expectations to each other.) Being a couple is really not an easy job. You have to constantly remind yourself why you like the person in the first place, especially after the honeymoon. (Hey, isn’t this summer like our honeymoon XD) But we often forget to do so, or at least I do.

After saying goodbye to you, my heart suddenly sank. I felt so weird. We didn’t have a fight or any misunderstanding. But I didn’t see a smile on your face when I said goodbye. Maybe you are just exhausted. But it is not the facial expression that I saw, but the heart. And suddenly, I miss your smile so much.

Every time I nagged you, I would ask myself, “Am I right to be so demanding?” Like I said, I am a perfectionist. So I want everything to be on schedule. I want to start discussing or debating at 6 p.m. sharp. I want to meet people on time. I hate when things become out of control. But truth is, they always do. And then I will feel unhappy. I will stop trying hard. However, things shouldn’t be like this. (Why am I using so many “like”? Hmm, it must be that I am writing to you!)

When I focus so much on competition, I tend to forget the fun of debate. (It’s not that HKDO doesn’t worth us working our ass out!) But I don’t like myself being so harsh. It should be fun! I still remember what Won Chian lim said, debate is about having fun. Though I couldn’t believe that I actually quoted him, but he is right. Damn right! And I should always bear that in mind. Or you can remind me when I become too obsessive.

So why am I writing you a long and weak-structured letter in English? Well, at first, I just wanted to send you a song, which we sang a lot together. You will always be my dearest Anne, a good friend and a great partner. I will still be picky about your grammar mistakes and I will still want to occupy your time to practice as much as possible. But I want us both being happy during the process. It’s lovely to sing and play with you, and I want to make this upcoming month as lovely and memorable as it can be, no matter how many things are nagging us. So smile and go!

Let’s sing it next time! You know that I see your true color.

Always yours,
Tammy

True Color

You with the sad eyes
Don't be discouraged
Oh I realize
It’s hard to take courage
In a world full of people
You can lose sight of it all
And the darkness inside you
Can make you feel so small

But I see your true colors
Shining through
I see your true colors
And that's why I love you
So don't be afraid to let them show
Your true colors
True colors are beautiful,
Like a rainbow

Show me a smile then,
Don't be unhappy, can't remember
When I last saw you laughing
If this world makes you crazy
And you've taken all you can bear
You call me up
Because you know I'll be there

And I'll see your true colors
Shining through
I see your true colors
And that's why I love you
So don't be afraid to let them show
Your true colors
True colors are beautiful,
Like a rainbow

(When I last saw you laughing)
If this world makes you crazy
And you've taken all you can bear
You call me up
Because you know I'll be there

And I'll see your true colors
Shining through
I see your true colors
And that's why I love you
So don't be afraid to let them show

Your true colors
True colors
True colors
Shining through

I see your true colors
And that's why I love you
So don't be afraid to let them show
Your true colors
True colors are beautiful,
Like a rainbow